Squeeky Kleen

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CROOKS
Squeeky Kleen
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Real name	Dirk McHugh
Background	Personal Butler
CROOKS Position	Yes-man.
Trademark Features	Skinny stature and a bald head. Uses a microphone to help him listen only to Big Boss and do what Big Boss tells him to.
Extra Specialty	Waiting on Big Boss hand and foot, even though he screws up sometimes.
Significant Episode Appearances	The Case of The Highway Robbery, The Case of The Midas Touch, The Case of Berserko's Big Surprise, The Case of The Spotless Kingpin, The Case of The Iceberg Pirates, The Case of The Big Boss' Master Plan Part 2, The Case of The Super Shakedown.
Voiced by	Marvin Goldhar

Squeeky Kleen is a cartoon character in the TV series C.O.P.S., which ran from 1988-1989.

Character Profile

Squeeky Kleen is Big Boss' personal servant who is seen as a very skinny, bald headed man who serves Big Boss as a yes man and waits on Big Boss hand and foot. He tries to do everything he can to please his boss even though he screws up sometimes. He is seen with a special microphone attached to his ear where he can only hear the words of Big Boss and obey his every command, including breaking out the mini-sub, a whale-like submarine, as seen in The Case of The Iceberg Pirates for instance.

Squeeky Kleen is only seen the comics and the cartoon. He was never part of the toy series.

In the comics, Squeeky has a brown suit with a white shirt underneath, while in the cartoon, he is seen in a light purple suit with a yellow shirt, red vest, and a dark blue tie underneath. Squeeky's voice was based on that of Peter Lorre.

Character Highlights

The Case of The Spotless Kingpin

Squeeky was ordered by Big Boss to make him a special suit that allows him to resist all kinds of dirt since Big Boss was getting very tired and frustrated by getting stains on his favorite normal suit. Squeeky went to get help from Berserko and Rock Krusher, who were playing cards at their rundown apartment on the bad side of town. Together, Big Boss' crooks broke into the labs to steal some chemicals to help in making the spotless suit. Upon hearing of this, Bulletproof sent out Highway, Bowser, and Blitz to take them down. When they arrived at the location where the crooks were making the suit, Berserko witlessly threw the suit at them despite Squeeky's protest. After they were able to subdue and get away from the C.O.P.S., Squeeky presented the suit to Big Boss. He put it on, and the dirt started to be pulled away from the furniture, the floor and from the whole room to him instead. Big Boss became completely covered with dirt from neck to toe. Berserko must have messed up the chemicals from the suit when he threw it at the C.O.P.S., who eventually escaped from being sewn onto a fabric and returning to the precinct dreading the If-you-can't-catch-a-Crook-don't-wear-a-badge speech from Bulletproof. The so-called spotless suit became a spot-filled suit thanks to Berserko's carelessness.

Big Boss, so enraged, ordered his crooks to fix up a formula that will reverse the effects of the ill-fated suit and get the dirt away from him. Squeeky then had to have Dr. BadVibes make out the formula, hoping that would cure him of this dirty predicament. Later, Squeeky was able to escape from the C.O.P.S. again, who were now able to nab Berserko and Rock Krusher and put them both in the slammer. He raced back the penthouse with the formula. At Big Boss' order he splashed the formula on him, seeing the dirt dissolve away — and the suit too, revealing Big Boss' pig trousers, a white sweatshirt, and one angry Big Boss who starts chasing after Squeeky Kleen the moment he saw himself without the ill-fated suit.

The Case of The Midas Touch

In this episode, Squeeky wound up having a special "Midas" glove device get stuck on one of his hands, changing everything and everyone to gold (including Big Boss and Dr. BadVibes). He went about trying to get the stubborn thing off his hand while changing everything he touched into gold, until eventually it was removed by Powderkeg. Squeeky himself got time in prison for disturbing the peace.